I just can't tell you how excited and privileged I feel to be lead into this crazy world of body work!!! Every time I take the time to ground, center and let the Holy Spirit in before a session, amazing things happen. Every time!
I'm getting my hands on people a lot more which is obviously helping me to learn and grow faster than when I am just taking the classes. Most of the people I've been working on lately, have experienced no or very little body/energy work, and show some sort of skepticism in the beginning even if they don't admit that to me until later. Before each session, I'm always afraid that these people won't feel anything since their bodies aren't used to responding to light touch body work (craniosacral, not massage), but they do!
Last night, I did some work on Dan because he's been having a minor health issue. It was a beautiful dance of reiki, craniosacral, visceral manipulation, prayers, God, and meditation. After the session, we processed what had happened, and discovered that my prayers were corresponding perfectly with the images he was getting, and at one point, we were given the exact same image simultaneously.
This is fun!!!
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Friday, October 8, 2010
the wrench
Last year, my holistic M.D. described what was happening to me physically as a “wrench being thrown into my system,” implying that there might have been one thing (the wrench) that initially started the downward spiral, but from there, everything was disturbed, like a domino affect. It rang true to me when she said it considering my understanding of the interconnectedness of the body. You can’t have something go wrong without it affecting almost every other part of your body in some way. Even though I didn’t know what initiated the downward spiral, I could work toward restoring the system holistically.
I have had theories of what this wrench in the system might have been, but the other day, I discovered what it actually was. One year and 9 months later. I was excited at first, relieved. And then sad. If I just would have avoided this one thing, this all might not have happened.
But very quickly, I knew I did not regret what had happened and the upheaval that it had caused. What else would have lead me to leave social work and do something that I was really meant to do? Nothing short of chaos would have. I had NO idea I wasn’t in the right career. And of course, it was not coincidence that “the wrench” was revealed to me at a time when I am now so sure that I am exactly where I am supposed to be.
And all those things in the previous blog entry about what my body has been telling me? I wouldn’t have learned those things and countless others if I could have just written the chaos off with one reason.
I don’t feel like naming what the wrench was, and I really don’t want to spend too much time thinking or writing about it. I’m moving forward now. I’m excited about the future. And I have no regrets.
I have had theories of what this wrench in the system might have been, but the other day, I discovered what it actually was. One year and 9 months later. I was excited at first, relieved. And then sad. If I just would have avoided this one thing, this all might not have happened.
But very quickly, I knew I did not regret what had happened and the upheaval that it had caused. What else would have lead me to leave social work and do something that I was really meant to do? Nothing short of chaos would have. I had NO idea I wasn’t in the right career. And of course, it was not coincidence that “the wrench” was revealed to me at a time when I am now so sure that I am exactly where I am supposed to be.
And all those things in the previous blog entry about what my body has been telling me? I wouldn’t have learned those things and countless others if I could have just written the chaos off with one reason.
I don’t feel like naming what the wrench was, and I really don’t want to spend too much time thinking or writing about it. I’m moving forward now. I’m excited about the future. And I have no regrets.
Friday, September 17, 2010
Saturn Returned
Last year when I was really going through it, I would explain the chaos that was happening in my life and people would ask, "how old are you?" I'd tell them, and they would nod knowingly, "Oh it's your Saturn Return!" Seriously this happened several different times. (Only in the Bay Area. I know.) I had never heard of the concept, but when I started reading about it, it resonated so deeply, I couldn't believe it.
Here is an excerpt from Wikipedia. I really like how it sums it up:
The Saturn Return is an astrological phenomenon that occurs at the ages of 27-30, 58-60, 86-88, etc., coinciding with the time it takes the planet Saturn to make one orbit around the sun. It is believed by astrologers that as Saturn "returns" to the degree in which it occupied at the time of birth—approximately every 29.5 years—a person crosses over a major threshold and into the next stage of life. With the first Saturn Return, a person leaves youth behind and enters adulthood. With the second Return, maturity. And the third and usually final Return, a person enters wise old age.
The first Saturn Return is famous because it represents the first test of character and the structures a person has built their life upon. According to traditions, should these structures be unsound, or if a person is living out of touch with his or her true values, the Saturn Return will be a time of upheaval and limitations as Saturn forces him or her to jettison old concepts and worn out patterns of living. It is not uncommon for relationships and jobs to end during this time of life restructuring and reevaluation.
But the Saturn Return is not all about painful endings. During this time astrologers note that goals are consolidated and people tend to gain a better vision of where they are going in life. There are added responsibilities and a person may reap the rewards from his or her hard work. Many major life milestones seem to happen around the ages of 29 and 30. This is why astrologers believe that the thirtieth birthday is such a major rite of passage because it marks the true beginning of adulthood, self-evaluation, independence, ambition, and self-actualization.
Like the excerpt says, I believe I was not living out all of my values and that many of the structures I had built my life on, were not making my life or my health sustainable. There are many examples, but one of the main ones involved not living out my values through my career.
At the social work agency where I was working, there was so much injustice, it was overwhelming. The injustices that had been done to my teenage clients by their parents, the systemic injustices of capitalism and racism, etc., and the injustices that we at the agency were carrying out, like repeat abandonment, racism, hypocrisy, and all and all, setting the children up to fail.
I have always been an idealist, and I apparently could not thrive in a system that is THAT inherently flawed. I literally did not have the energy to try and make change even at the agency level. My time was filled up by keeping my clients and myself afloat and the OVERWHELMING amount of paperwork we had to give to the government in order to get money from them. It was suffocating.
I did the best I could, but I had to get out. My mind did not know this. But my body sure as hell did.
Sometimes labels can be very helpful. Knowing about the Saturn Return phenomena made me feel less alone. It assured me that this was just an era and that there would be an ending point.
I would later find out (and am still finding out), that I was made to do something else. Something that is, in fact, in line with my values, something where I could still fight for justice but not in a setting that was so overwhelming, something that supports others while at the same time supports myself, my health, and is in line with who I was made to be.
Here is an excerpt from Wikipedia. I really like how it sums it up:
The Saturn Return is an astrological phenomenon that occurs at the ages of 27-30, 58-60, 86-88, etc., coinciding with the time it takes the planet Saturn to make one orbit around the sun. It is believed by astrologers that as Saturn "returns" to the degree in which it occupied at the time of birth—approximately every 29.5 years—a person crosses over a major threshold and into the next stage of life. With the first Saturn Return, a person leaves youth behind and enters adulthood. With the second Return, maturity. And the third and usually final Return, a person enters wise old age.
The first Saturn Return is famous because it represents the first test of character and the structures a person has built their life upon. According to traditions, should these structures be unsound, or if a person is living out of touch with his or her true values, the Saturn Return will be a time of upheaval and limitations as Saturn forces him or her to jettison old concepts and worn out patterns of living. It is not uncommon for relationships and jobs to end during this time of life restructuring and reevaluation.
But the Saturn Return is not all about painful endings. During this time astrologers note that goals are consolidated and people tend to gain a better vision of where they are going in life. There are added responsibilities and a person may reap the rewards from his or her hard work. Many major life milestones seem to happen around the ages of 29 and 30. This is why astrologers believe that the thirtieth birthday is such a major rite of passage because it marks the true beginning of adulthood, self-evaluation, independence, ambition, and self-actualization.
Like the excerpt says, I believe I was not living out all of my values and that many of the structures I had built my life on, were not making my life or my health sustainable. There are many examples, but one of the main ones involved not living out my values through my career.
At the social work agency where I was working, there was so much injustice, it was overwhelming. The injustices that had been done to my teenage clients by their parents, the systemic injustices of capitalism and racism, etc., and the injustices that we at the agency were carrying out, like repeat abandonment, racism, hypocrisy, and all and all, setting the children up to fail.
I have always been an idealist, and I apparently could not thrive in a system that is THAT inherently flawed. I literally did not have the energy to try and make change even at the agency level. My time was filled up by keeping my clients and myself afloat and the OVERWHELMING amount of paperwork we had to give to the government in order to get money from them. It was suffocating.
I did the best I could, but I had to get out. My mind did not know this. But my body sure as hell did.
Sometimes labels can be very helpful. Knowing about the Saturn Return phenomena made me feel less alone. It assured me that this was just an era and that there would be an ending point.
I would later find out (and am still finding out), that I was made to do something else. Something that is, in fact, in line with my values, something where I could still fight for justice but not in a setting that was so overwhelming, something that supports others while at the same time supports myself, my health, and is in line with who I was made to be.
Thursday, September 16, 2010
my talking body
My body has a lot to say. I'm still learning from it. I'm sure it has even more to say, but these a few of things it has wanted me to do so far:
quit my job
leave social work
go to school to become a healer
stay hydrated and keep my electrolytes in balance!
get the right amount of nutrients
learn what it does and doesn't like to digest
eat fish
take naps!
find a different network chiropractor
breathe
go to a craniosacral therapist regularly
spend hella more time in silence, praying, meditating, and unwinding
find chill work while going to school
learn to work with my energy, kundalini and others
not listen to my mind as much
get the right amount of sunshine
spend more time in nature
dance!
Man, bodies are so intelligent.
quit my job
leave social work
go to school to become a healer
stay hydrated and keep my electrolytes in balance!
get the right amount of nutrients
learn what it does and doesn't like to digest
eat fish
take naps!
find a different network chiropractor
breathe
go to a craniosacral therapist regularly
spend hella more time in silence, praying, meditating, and unwinding
find chill work while going to school
learn to work with my energy, kundalini and others
not listen to my mind as much
get the right amount of sunshine
spend more time in nature
dance!
Man, bodies are so intelligent.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
summer and babies
Oops. . . It's been awhile. It's been a lovely summer. We've gotten to do a lot of traveling around the area- Big Sur, Davis, Napa and Santa Cruz. I definitely was not feeling up for any traveling last year so am very thankful for these trips. We've also been barbecuing, taking our hammock to Dolores Park, getting ready to release Dan's album, and bumming around the neighborhood.
Work-wise, my gig with the 5 year old ended in July, and thanks to God and the Universe for looking out for me (as always), I quickly got a new gig watching an adorable baby boy who lives right across the street. He was 3 months when I started and is now almost 6 months. I am learning so much about babies . . . It's like taking a class, and he is my lab! It's fun to watch him grow and change from week to week. If Dan and I decide to adopt, I now know how incredibly easy it will be to fall in love with an adopted baby. I looked down at this little guy the second week and was like, "I LOOOOOVE you!!!" I'm with him Tuesday through Thursday and definitely miss him the other 4 days of the week.
It will be an exciting, extremely fulfilling, and difficult era when Dan and I have kids. I look forward to it and fear it at the same time. But we both are sure it's not the time yet. So here's to this baby-less era full of self-discovery, self-growth, date nights, quiet evenings, a clean house, spit-up-free clothes, a ton of free-time, fun with friends and late night FDB shows! (Not that we won't have some of those things with kids, but probably a lot lot less.)
And also meanwhile, we are rejoicing in the growing babies of our friends and family- some in the womb and some already out! Woo hoo!! I'm going to be an auntie!!!
Work-wise, my gig with the 5 year old ended in July, and thanks to God and the Universe for looking out for me (as always), I quickly got a new gig watching an adorable baby boy who lives right across the street. He was 3 months when I started and is now almost 6 months. I am learning so much about babies . . . It's like taking a class, and he is my lab! It's fun to watch him grow and change from week to week. If Dan and I decide to adopt, I now know how incredibly easy it will be to fall in love with an adopted baby. I looked down at this little guy the second week and was like, "I LOOOOOVE you!!!" I'm with him Tuesday through Thursday and definitely miss him the other 4 days of the week.
It will be an exciting, extremely fulfilling, and difficult era when Dan and I have kids. I look forward to it and fear it at the same time. But we both are sure it's not the time yet. So here's to this baby-less era full of self-discovery, self-growth, date nights, quiet evenings, a clean house, spit-up-free clothes, a ton of free-time, fun with friends and late night FDB shows! (Not that we won't have some of those things with kids, but probably a lot lot less.)
And also meanwhile, we are rejoicing in the growing babies of our friends and family- some in the womb and some already out! Woo hoo!! I'm going to be an auntie!!!
Monday, September 13, 2010
#3- Quaker Service
I've been wanting to visit a Quaker service for a long time now. Their value for listening to God through silence is also a strong value of mine. I also have several Quaker ancestors, including William Penn, a well-known Quaker and the founder of Pennsylvania.
I got there in time to attend the pre-service introduction for visitors. The man leading the intro explained to me and two other women about the service. It was pretty simple- we would sit in silence for one hour and only speak out loud if lead by the Holy Spirit to share something with the congregation. The service would end when the leading deacon shook hands with the person next to him.
The man asked the three of us what had brought us to here today. I couldn't help but inform him that I was the great great great great great great great grand niece of William Penn. (Where else could I ever brag about something like that?) And he was indeed impressed. ;)
The service was held in a simple room with concrete floors, fluorescent lights, and chairs set in a circle. The service began, and I sat in silence with about 50 other people, mostly caucasian, a variety of ages. Three people spoke that morning during the hour of silence, mostly about something they read earlier in the week and the insight they gained from it.
Overall, it seemed like a very nice, thoughtful group of people. I might go back again sometime because a few people mentioned that every service was different, which makes sense, since different people would be lead to share different things each time.
I was not particularly drawn to it though. I missed spoken prayers, songs and dancing. I also realized how important an inspiring worship environment is to me. Although I don't need a fancy cathedral and I respect the Quakers value for simplicity, I do appreciate something beautiful to meditate on.
I got there in time to attend the pre-service introduction for visitors. The man leading the intro explained to me and two other women about the service. It was pretty simple- we would sit in silence for one hour and only speak out loud if lead by the Holy Spirit to share something with the congregation. The service would end when the leading deacon shook hands with the person next to him.
The man asked the three of us what had brought us to here today. I couldn't help but inform him that I was the great great great great great great great grand niece of William Penn. (Where else could I ever brag about something like that?) And he was indeed impressed. ;)
The service was held in a simple room with concrete floors, fluorescent lights, and chairs set in a circle. The service began, and I sat in silence with about 50 other people, mostly caucasian, a variety of ages. Three people spoke that morning during the hour of silence, mostly about something they read earlier in the week and the insight they gained from it.
Overall, it seemed like a very nice, thoughtful group of people. I might go back again sometime because a few people mentioned that every service was different, which makes sense, since different people would be lead to share different things each time.
I was not particularly drawn to it though. I missed spoken prayers, songs and dancing. I also realized how important an inspiring worship environment is to me. Although I don't need a fancy cathedral and I respect the Quakers value for simplicity, I do appreciate something beautiful to meditate on.
Saturday, July 10, 2010
relax!
So the retreat was just lovely.
Before I arrived, part of me was worried that God was going to give me some new, crazy revelation again. Like I need to quit learning body work and move to another country or you know, join a circus or something. But lo and behold, the only messages I was getting that weekend was to relax, have fun, and enjoy the nature. Yay! So that's what I did.
And I also attempted to not make my retreat into a to-do list either:
1) pray
2) attend eucharist
3) pray again
4) walk all the paths on the property and come up with four life metaphors related to the nature I see
5) pray
For real. I could see myself doing that. But I did pretty well not to-do listing my retreat. For the most part, I wandered around and soaked in the nature, looked at the art in the center, read and journaled in my room, and prayed whenever I felt like it.
I also bought a beautiful Celtic cross from the retreat center gift shop. It's from 9th century Ireland! I was SO excited because I've been trying to get in touch with my Scotch-Irish heritage. I put it about the "altar" in the my room. I love it.
Before I arrived, part of me was worried that God was going to give me some new, crazy revelation again. Like I need to quit learning body work and move to another country or you know, join a circus or something. But lo and behold, the only messages I was getting that weekend was to relax, have fun, and enjoy the nature. Yay! So that's what I did.
And I also attempted to not make my retreat into a to-do list either:
1) pray
2) attend eucharist
3) pray again
4) walk all the paths on the property and come up with four life metaphors related to the nature I see
5) pray
For real. I could see myself doing that. But I did pretty well not to-do listing my retreat. For the most part, I wandered around and soaked in the nature, looked at the art in the center, read and journaled in my room, and prayed whenever I felt like it.
I also bought a beautiful Celtic cross from the retreat center gift shop. It's from 9th century Ireland! I was SO excited because I've been trying to get in touch with my Scotch-Irish heritage. I put it about the "altar" in the my room. I love it.
Friday, June 25, 2010
retreat
I'm on my first retreat ever. A silent self-directed retreat at a liberal Catholic convent 20 miles south of San Francisco.
My intent is to live in the present moment and receive whatever comes.
I've been reading the book "Eat, Pray, Love" and in the book, the author, Elizabeth Gilbert, talks about her friend Susan, who whenever sees a beautiful place--exclaims in near panic--"It's so beautiful here! I want to come back here someday!" And then Elizabeth attemps to convince her that she is already here!
Wow. I see myself so much in Susan. I know I've done that a million times. And I already thought that at the beginning of the trip. "Oh I need to come back here! When can I come back? Can I afford it? When? When? When?"
So my goal is to you know, realize I'm here right now. And enjoy it. Doesn't seem too hard, does it?
My intent is to live in the present moment and receive whatever comes.
I've been reading the book "Eat, Pray, Love" and in the book, the author, Elizabeth Gilbert, talks about her friend Susan, who whenever sees a beautiful place--exclaims in near panic--"It's so beautiful here! I want to come back here someday!" And then Elizabeth attemps to convince her that she is already here!
Wow. I see myself so much in Susan. I know I've done that a million times. And I already thought that at the beginning of the trip. "Oh I need to come back here! When can I come back? Can I afford it? When? When? When?"
So my goal is to you know, realize I'm here right now. And enjoy it. Doesn't seem too hard, does it?
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
#2- First Unitarian Universalist Church
Last Sunday, I didn't make it over the bridge to First Congo, so I googled some churches in the area and settled on First Unitarian Universalist. Dan was not feeling churchy that day so he dropped me off and spent his Sunday morning worshipping in the aisles of Trader Joe's.
The church was a big, beautiful building, and the pews were nearly full. The service very much reminded me of Dan's and my former United Church of Christ church (Edgewood United) back in East Lansing. There was an organ and a choir and classical music. It was somewhat liturgical, but not as much as the Catholic church. There were three white men in robes leading the service (which differs from Edgewood where there was one white, lesbian pastor). But both churches mentioned various social justice issues up at the pulpit just like Edgewood would.
The congregation was mostly white older folks, with a few Asian-Americans and Latinas. Still no African-Americans. There were also some middle-aged folks as well as a few young people. Instead of a sermon, the choir was performing a requiem that day. I'm not a big fan. It was in a minor key and sounded very ominous. They were very good though. I'm sure there are a lot of people who would have enjoyed it. The congregation seemed to.
Their bulletin had a paragraph that read, "Who are we? We are thinkers and feelers, atheists and believers, Eastern and Western, children and adults, sinners and saints, gay and straight, rich and poor, New Agers and old timers, native San Franciscans and recent arrivals, conservatives and liberals, early birds and procrastinators. Our differences unite us. Surely there is a place for you too."
God was mentioned often, even though the website had a video titled "God is optional, you are not," (which, frankly, annoyed me). I felt very comfortable there as a Christian, but I really can't imagine everyone mentioned in the above paragraph feeling comfortable there, specifically atheists and conservatives.
Next week the sermon is called "Noah's Ark and Animal Rights," and they're having pets in the courtyard that you can adopt! I sat in that beautiful and sunny courtyard after church and watched a visiting Pagan group raise the May pole for May Day. I took note of the beautiful open space and wondered if I could sneak back there sometime just to catch some rays.
I felt very satisfied after going, even though it wasn't really my thing. I'm feeling venturesome lately, which is so different than last year when I was feeling sick, tired and overstimulated. I'm also conscience that I am experiencing more freedom in regard to other faiths and religions. I never would have gone to a Unitarian church in high school or early college. I feel much more solid in my own faith now and am less fearful of other religions and belief systems. And it's always nice to not think you have to convert the whole world to Christianity like I did in junior high and high school!
The church was a big, beautiful building, and the pews were nearly full. The service very much reminded me of Dan's and my former United Church of Christ church (Edgewood United) back in East Lansing. There was an organ and a choir and classical music. It was somewhat liturgical, but not as much as the Catholic church. There were three white men in robes leading the service (which differs from Edgewood where there was one white, lesbian pastor). But both churches mentioned various social justice issues up at the pulpit just like Edgewood would.
The congregation was mostly white older folks, with a few Asian-Americans and Latinas. Still no African-Americans. There were also some middle-aged folks as well as a few young people. Instead of a sermon, the choir was performing a requiem that day. I'm not a big fan. It was in a minor key and sounded very ominous. They were very good though. I'm sure there are a lot of people who would have enjoyed it. The congregation seemed to.
Their bulletin had a paragraph that read, "Who are we? We are thinkers and feelers, atheists and believers, Eastern and Western, children and adults, sinners and saints, gay and straight, rich and poor, New Agers and old timers, native San Franciscans and recent arrivals, conservatives and liberals, early birds and procrastinators. Our differences unite us. Surely there is a place for you too."
God was mentioned often, even though the website had a video titled "God is optional, you are not," (which, frankly, annoyed me). I felt very comfortable there as a Christian, but I really can't imagine everyone mentioned in the above paragraph feeling comfortable there, specifically atheists and conservatives.
Next week the sermon is called "Noah's Ark and Animal Rights," and they're having pets in the courtyard that you can adopt! I sat in that beautiful and sunny courtyard after church and watched a visiting Pagan group raise the May pole for May Day. I took note of the beautiful open space and wondered if I could sneak back there sometime just to catch some rays.
I felt very satisfied after going, even though it wasn't really my thing. I'm feeling venturesome lately, which is so different than last year when I was feeling sick, tired and overstimulated. I'm also conscience that I am experiencing more freedom in regard to other faiths and religions. I never would have gone to a Unitarian church in high school or early college. I feel much more solid in my own faith now and am less fearful of other religions and belief systems. And it's always nice to not think you have to convert the whole world to Christianity like I did in junior high and high school!
Monday, May 3, 2010
#1- St. Paul's
The first church I visited in San Francisco was St. Paul's, a Catholic church in Noe Valley a couple of blocks from our apartment. They had sent us a nice welcome-to-the-neighborhood letter when we first moved to SF that said: you are welcome to come visit us, this is what we are about, and also, here is another list of all different kinds of places of worship in the area if our church is not your thing. Dan and I were impressed. We had also looked them up on the internet and discovered that Sister Act was filmed there! Woo hoo! I LOVE Sister Act.
The place was pretty empty the day we visited. We were attending the second and later service, however, so it's possible the first service had more people.
The service was, of course, very liturgical and formal. There was no way to know (as clueless, visiting Protestants) when to sit or stand or cross ourselves so we had to watch the people around us and follow them as closely as we could. Some part of me was definitely expecting the choir to break out into "My God" so I was a little disappointed, to say the least.
There were several people and even a large GROUP of people who came in just for the communion and then left afterwards. That was fascinating to me. I didn't go up for communion this time because I didn't know the routine and I was afraid the priest was going to persecute me in front of the whole congregation if he knew I wasn't Catholic. But I'm determined to ask one of my Catholic friends to teach me what to do, so I can participate next time.
There was an organ and hymns, which are not for me. The priest seemed nice. There were Latinos, Asian Americans and whites- no African-Americans.
Probably won't go back again unless I hear Whoopi is stopping by. It was nice to visit though!
The place was pretty empty the day we visited. We were attending the second and later service, however, so it's possible the first service had more people.
The service was, of course, very liturgical and formal. There was no way to know (as clueless, visiting Protestants) when to sit or stand or cross ourselves so we had to watch the people around us and follow them as closely as we could. Some part of me was definitely expecting the choir to break out into "My God" so I was a little disappointed, to say the least.
There were several people and even a large GROUP of people who came in just for the communion and then left afterwards. That was fascinating to me. I didn't go up for communion this time because I didn't know the routine and I was afraid the priest was going to persecute me in front of the whole congregation if he knew I wasn't Catholic. But I'm determined to ask one of my Catholic friends to teach me what to do, so I can participate next time.
There was an organ and hymns, which are not for me. The priest seemed nice. There were Latinos, Asian Americans and whites- no African-Americans.
Probably won't go back again unless I hear Whoopi is stopping by. It was nice to visit though!
Sunday, May 2, 2010
exploring
I've had the desire to explore other places of worship in San Francisco. I am not planning on leaving my home church in Oakland- I really don't think anything can compare. But I'm feeling adventurous lately and want to know what all is out there.
My church in Oakland is in major transition right now after the resignation of our prophet pastor a few months ago. There is a possibility that the church may die out in the next year or so, which would be very sad. All I know is that I always want to stay in touch with my family there, in some capacity. And I know I need a kick-ass place to worship with gospel/rock music.
But there are those days, when I don't feel like dancing and clapping and raising my hands and instead need quiet . . . or to be anonymous with strangers . . . or just need something different. So! . . . I'm going on an exploration and will keep this blog updated with my adventures!
My church in Oakland is in major transition right now after the resignation of our prophet pastor a few months ago. There is a possibility that the church may die out in the next year or so, which would be very sad. All I know is that I always want to stay in touch with my family there, in some capacity. And I know I need a kick-ass place to worship with gospel/rock music.
But there are those days, when I don't feel like dancing and clapping and raising my hands and instead need quiet . . . or to be anonymous with strangers . . . or just need something different. So! . . . I'm going on an exploration and will keep this blog updated with my adventures!
Saturday, May 1, 2010
energy work/body work=awesome shit
I've been practicing craniosacral and massage on my good friend and neighbor Meghan. She recently got her Reiki certificate and practiced on me tonight. It was amazing. I know there are a lot of people out there who can't comprehend how this shit works. But man, this shit works. It was so powerful. I just really believe that we were all made with the innate ability to put our hands on one another and heal each other. Thank you God for letting me into this new dimension of life.
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
little human beings!
Um so . . . I'm already a little tired of cleaning. I was really enjoying it at first, but now that I'm practicing massage and CranioSacral more, I don't want to put all that repetitive strain on my arms and hands. It also seems that nannying and babysitting is what is really needed right now since there are so many families with both parents working.
So I've been hanging out with a 5 year old boy three days a week, picking him up from school, playing sports and cards with him, and then making him dinner before his mommies come home. I like him. It's taken him a few weeks to warm up to me, but now we're buddies. He's a thinker. Dan says he sounds like him when he was little.
I also just started hanging out with a 5 month old baby one day a week. I haven't babysat a baby since high school! But he seems pretty chill so far, I just make faces at him and then put him down for a nap. The family lives two blocks down from our apartment so that's nice.
I only watch the 10 year old girl that I was sitting before on an as-needed basis now, but her mom seems to be calling me about once a week so that's nice since I'm still super in-love with this girl. Yesterday I picked her and her 15 year old sister up from a salon where the 15 year old was getting her hair done for prom. (Prom- yay! I love those days!) A senior that she barely knows had asked her to prom and she was really nervous about it. We talked about important things like how she was going to pose for pictures and how she was going to do her makeup, etc. But we also had some after-school-special conversations about alcohol, drugs, and sex. It was great. :) I LOVE teen girls and preteen girls. They are still my favorite!
So like everything else in my life, it's just fascinating to see where God and the universe is taking me. I only have about 4 cleaning clients now and only one is weekly, the others are monthly.
I'm just thankful to be making money so we can stay in our cute little apartment in San Francisco and buy yummy food. That's what it's all about! Food and shelter are the best, right?
So I've been hanging out with a 5 year old boy three days a week, picking him up from school, playing sports and cards with him, and then making him dinner before his mommies come home. I like him. It's taken him a few weeks to warm up to me, but now we're buddies. He's a thinker. Dan says he sounds like him when he was little.
I also just started hanging out with a 5 month old baby one day a week. I haven't babysat a baby since high school! But he seems pretty chill so far, I just make faces at him and then put him down for a nap. The family lives two blocks down from our apartment so that's nice.
I only watch the 10 year old girl that I was sitting before on an as-needed basis now, but her mom seems to be calling me about once a week so that's nice since I'm still super in-love with this girl. Yesterday I picked her and her 15 year old sister up from a salon where the 15 year old was getting her hair done for prom. (Prom- yay! I love those days!) A senior that she barely knows had asked her to prom and she was really nervous about it. We talked about important things like how she was going to pose for pictures and how she was going to do her makeup, etc. But we also had some after-school-special conversations about alcohol, drugs, and sex. It was great. :) I LOVE teen girls and preteen girls. They are still my favorite!
So like everything else in my life, it's just fascinating to see where God and the universe is taking me. I only have about 4 cleaning clients now and only one is weekly, the others are monthly.
I'm just thankful to be making money so we can stay in our cute little apartment in San Francisco and buy yummy food. That's what it's all about! Food and shelter are the best, right?
Friday, February 19, 2010
makin' a living
I've been looking for all sorts of jobs on craigslist and have found it interesting that none of the social work-y types of jobs have panned out. And I'm not willing to do the full-time case management jobs anymore so that doesn't leave much left.
So right now I'm a "Mother's Helper" for a family right in the neighborhood. I hang out with their ten year old (and sometimes their 15 year old too), I tidy the house, do the laundry and sometimes cook. I'm really enjoying it! I'm already head over heels for the 10 year old. It's such a fun age, and we have a lot in common. She sings in a rock band that plays covers by bands like the White Stripes and Radiohead. She's already way cooler than me at age 10. She also takes hip hop dance class which inspired me to do the same.
I've also got about four clients now for my "green housecleaning" business that I started after I moved. It's fascinating to see inside different houses and apartments and to observe how people live. Even just to see all the different kinds of people who live in San Francisco is interesting. Everyone's here for a different reason.
I feel pretty content. I just need a few more cleaning clients so I can make enough for our budget. But otherwise, I would be perfectly happy doing this until I get further on the body work career path.
Screw 7 years of school, I'm going to CLEAN!!!
So right now I'm a "Mother's Helper" for a family right in the neighborhood. I hang out with their ten year old (and sometimes their 15 year old too), I tidy the house, do the laundry and sometimes cook. I'm really enjoying it! I'm already head over heels for the 10 year old. It's such a fun age, and we have a lot in common. She sings in a rock band that plays covers by bands like the White Stripes and Radiohead. She's already way cooler than me at age 10. She also takes hip hop dance class which inspired me to do the same.
I've also got about four clients now for my "green housecleaning" business that I started after I moved. It's fascinating to see inside different houses and apartments and to observe how people live. Even just to see all the different kinds of people who live in San Francisco is interesting. Everyone's here for a different reason.
I feel pretty content. I just need a few more cleaning clients so I can make enough for our budget. But otherwise, I would be perfectly happy doing this until I get further on the body work career path.
Screw 7 years of school, I'm going to CLEAN!!!
Thursday, February 18, 2010
new possibilities
I've been living in San Francisco for over four months now and have been thoroughly enjoying it! It's funny how easy transitions can be when you're on the right path and also when you let go and ride it.
I love how everything is so close, and I love being able to walk to the grocery stores, restaurants, stores, park, my new network chiropractor, my new craniosacral therapist, etc.! I love being neighbors with my friends and sharing weekly dinners with them. And this may sound super cheesy and cliche, but as soon as I moved here, I really felt like anything was possible. That I could be, do and wear anything I wanted!
So for now, this means going to school to become a body worker! A CranioSacral Therapist specifically. I took my first class through the Upledger Institute in January and absolutely loved it. I was telling my mom and Dan how everyone in the class could feel such subtle things in their bodies, and they both, on separate occasions, said, "Those are your people!" They ARE my people- woo hoo!
Among other things, I love how craniosacral therapy has such a solid, science-based foundation but then still leaves room for intuition and energy work. It's really amazing. It's worked wonders for me and my migraines and balance issues. And as I tell people what I'm doing, I keep hearing more and more stories of healing from people I didn't even know had heard of it. The only thing I'm concerned about is being able to switch from listening to my own body to listening to other people's bodies. But I'm assuming this will just take practice.
My next craniosacral class is in September, so meanwhile, I'm getting my massage therapy certificate. After a lot of research, it seems like this is the best way to get the "license to touch." I'm excited about it too though. It's all connected!
I love how everything is so close, and I love being able to walk to the grocery stores, restaurants, stores, park, my new network chiropractor, my new craniosacral therapist, etc.! I love being neighbors with my friends and sharing weekly dinners with them. And this may sound super cheesy and cliche, but as soon as I moved here, I really felt like anything was possible. That I could be, do and wear anything I wanted!
So for now, this means going to school to become a body worker! A CranioSacral Therapist specifically. I took my first class through the Upledger Institute in January and absolutely loved it. I was telling my mom and Dan how everyone in the class could feel such subtle things in their bodies, and they both, on separate occasions, said, "Those are your people!" They ARE my people- woo hoo!
Among other things, I love how craniosacral therapy has such a solid, science-based foundation but then still leaves room for intuition and energy work. It's really amazing. It's worked wonders for me and my migraines and balance issues. And as I tell people what I'm doing, I keep hearing more and more stories of healing from people I didn't even know had heard of it. The only thing I'm concerned about is being able to switch from listening to my own body to listening to other people's bodies. But I'm assuming this will just take practice.
My next craniosacral class is in September, so meanwhile, I'm getting my massage therapy certificate. After a lot of research, it seems like this is the best way to get the "license to touch." I'm excited about it too though. It's all connected!
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